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Reddit attending a funeral. r/SeriousConversation is a subreddit for in-depth discussion. I wore all black both times From my limited experience of funerals probably only 50% of the funeral attendees go to the wake, and then another half of those stay for a cup of tea and a sandwich then go after saying hello to a few In terms of actually attending funerals, most of the time people attend to support the remaining people that were close to the person that died. Funeral attendance etiquette offers guidance for who should attend a funeral. A neighbor we were really close to recently passed and her funeral is next Saturday. Attending a last minute funeral and told to wear white; is it better to dress down in something white or wear something more formal of a different color? A coworker's mother passed away and our team However. People handle I wouldn't. If the funeral isn't going to do that for you, don't go. Reply reply yakumea • Ok that wasn’t my question Reply reply More replies Funeral directors/attendees of Reddit: what is the craziest shit you've seen go down at a funeral? [Serious] serious replies only COVID is spreading pretty far and wide again, so even if the brother doesn't attend, odds are that there will be infected people attending in a large funeral anyway. Some people need funerals to let go and it helps The funeral was organized by the father, and he said you could come. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Not all funerals are the same, but you should wear formal attire, at least a Funeral home for wake and rosary > cortège to church for Mass > cortège to cemetery for internment > drive to the family home. It's quite I think it is perfectly ok for you to skip the funeral. This tip can and should OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I declined going to a funeral and I’m being seen as shitty and inconsiderate and cold hearted. I don’t think it should matter and it’s selfish to expect everyone to be at a funeral. If you are ambivalent about going, and you don't - then a year from now you may have a 168 votes, 204 comments. Let´s make together a law about absurdly sad funerals ban and promote what you wrote. Everyone deals with grief in their own way and if you don't want to attend the Funerals are for the living. Tell us about . 2 - make it 3 - reasons: A) Going to their funeral would be like going to a stranger's funeral. If that matters to I’ve been unfortunate enough to have been to two funerals in the past few years, and the idea of wearing all black to a funeral doesn’t really seem to be a thing in Australia. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. Is there anyone you can ask to find out why Emily didn’t want you to attend the funeral of a close friend that you’ve known for 7 Reply reply More replies bigendall • Reply reply Anniemaniac • Reply reply CheckComprehensive22 • Reply reply More replies wildcharmander1992 •• Edited I wanted to go the funeral but was told no. If you're undecided about attending a funeral, learning the commonly Gifts aren't typically exchanged at funerals, and flowers are optional if there is a graveside service. It's a No. Since my brother lost his son 13 years ago he’s been unable to attend any funerals, including our mother’s and our brother’s recent funerals. The whole situation seems a little weird now and Hi! My friend is going to a funeral soon and I want to message her with "Hey, I know the funeral is today, ***". On top of reading this sub and everything else I can find about beginning, I've There is nothing wrong with not attending a persons funeral and it should not be viewed as disrespectful to the deceased. It’s wonderful Always go. She felt very uncomfortable being in the I feel uncomfortable about going to the funeral, because it not only brings personal triggering stuff about family members' deaths, but also feels a little insincere to go, since I've never met the deceased. If there is a patient or family for whom you’ve become particularly attached, and you feel the urge to go to the funeral because this person was special to you, of course you should go. Attending a funeral is purely a personal matter to pay respect to either the person who has passed or to the family. Personal note: I don’t like attending funerals of people I liked. I might've been unsupportive to her, making me the asshole Help keep the sub engaging! Explore valid reasons for missing a funeral and considerations for attending to ensure respectful decisions amidst emotional situations. Even if religion is why, it's good that funerals happen as We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. The amount of money one spends on it is trivial, too. I just could not take talking with people who all come to “pay The funeral is on Friday and I wanted to attend with some mutual friends to support her and her family, but apparently we have to RSVP and pay to attend because of catering or something. I have not made a final Legacy offers advice from experts to help answer all of your funeral etiquette questions: What is the difference between a memorial service and a My girlfriend is going to be attending her great grandmas funeral this Thursday’ but I don’t know what to tell her as in I can’t say “I hope all goes well” or something like that because well it’s a funeral and I Funerals serve a purpose for both the family and other mourners. A hug/handshake or squeeze and simple condolences ("I'm very sorry for your loss") are fine. I don’t mean that you should do this to The funeral service takes place in the morning and will be at a church but it sounds like immediately afterward everyone is going to the graveside service that is roughly 30 to 45 Unpopular opinion here but funerals are for the living. Funerals are to help those left behind deal with the loss. If they don’t want to come because they think funerals aren’t there To become a successful mortuary makeup artist, one can either attend mortuary college and gain state licensure as a funeral director or embalmer, or by attending beauty school. I've been to three in a bowling alley, the VFW, and an Elks Lodge at Funerals for a lot of people are about celebrating life, being supportive and being together. I just went to support my friend. Even just learning of several aunts’ deaths and While I personally see nothing wrong with it, I can imagine a lot of less sympathetic people will look at you poorly for not attending the funeral. To attend a funeral of someone you don't know is uncomfortable "I'm not comfortable attending". I've never been to a funeral, wedding, or any large celebratory event outside of Attending funerals is for the other ppl that are there. If you can, always show up to the funeral. One of my best friends’ dad just passed away on Monday, and there’s a visitation tomorrow and a funeral the next day. I had full intention of attending until Funerals are not for the dead, they are for the living. I don’t know what my friends are attending and I don’t want Generally funerals operate with a "the more the better" attitude. Your aunt's family will be touched that you traveled from out of state for any part of the events. The last place you’ll find me is a funeral of “someone I didn’t know well”. You can send a letter If you feel comfortable attending, absolutely go. And I've been to funerals that encourage you to dress in their football team colours. Funerals leave me feeling hollow and a little sick. Attending unrelated funerals Hello! I'm looking for a career change and have my eyes on a career as a funeral director. I have lived here for several years but I've been fortunate enough to not know anyone in the recent years who passed away, until now. Some for people I knew well, some for people I barely ever talked to. I Just do your best and understand the worst part of her life right now is not going to be how you behave at her husband's funeral. Title pretty much sums it up. It's a nice gesture. However, my mother is Learn the proper etiquette when attending a funeral with our guide at Direct Funeral. What your estranged family may potentially say about your attendance or lack thereof can be ignored. However, I'd caution you that a Not weird. Huge benefit of gathering together to share your grief. I barely knew the man but want to show support Feelings on attending viewings or funerals? Judged if one doesn’t attend? Attending funerals for loved ones is hard enough, but to be expected to talk to complete strangers would add a whole level of discomfort. You pick one or the other or attend both. " It means a lot to the mourners if you go. Wear something somewhat dressed up but comfortable. 🚀 Extremely fast fuzzy matcher & spelling checker in Python! - chinnichaitanya/spellwise Do not attend a funeral in skimpy or sloppy clothes as it could be seen as disrespectful to the deceased and their family. Funerals do nothing that the deceased is going to be aware of and are just a ritualised way for people to deal with their loss. Something like this, this or this is fine. " I think you can still pay your respects to the deceased or family in different ways. You show up to support your Dad, and your Mom, cuz she’s there for your Dad, and it’s your Dad’s father. Should I bring a homemade dish for the reception? Flowers? Would appreciate any tips. When my father-in-law passed away, A touchy subject perhaps, though if I may ask How many funerals have you attended? Any interesting funeral stories? Has anyone attended a joyous funeral? During Covid funerals were virtual and I think people are more understanding now if you can’t show up. I told my sister I won't be attending my BIL's funeral because she didn't invite our parents. There’s no requirement but it’s in bad taste to People grieve in their own ways. In my experience, families really care about how many people show up for the funeral. It's for a family friend I never met, but heard great things about. If they want to attend a funeral and show support to the person who’s died, then by all means do that. It's in a city a few hours drive away. An exception to this is when My Husband Forbids Me from Attending His Dad's Funeral, But I Go and Find Him with Another Woma Mind-Blown Drama 9 subscribers Subscribe Funerals are for the living. I think my LO would have been ok with that choice. Discover essential do's and don'ts to Generally, no. It seems important to you that he was your ex and to grieve him personally that way -- go ahead. If the wake or the funeral is publicized- that means anyone can attend. For the record, I also cannot imagine wanting to go to the funeral We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. I've attended a couple funerals for close family members recently. In some faiths a person is buried with 24 hours and many loved ones can’t attend. If you feel like you should be at the funeral, you should go. How you choose to do that is up to you. A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to finally find out if you were wrong in an argument that's been bothering you. Like for the other people that show up. You shouldn't be expected to attend a funeral of you don't feel up to it. As this is my first time attending a wake, I am unsure about the right etiquette I don't like attending funerals for this exact reason. This means I would have to take off two shifts at a job I just started. Funerals are about supporting the people who are left behind. Unless the person attending the funeral is deemed a threat to public safety, it is not legal to stop them from attending. Worse, I'd have to sit thru hearing a bunch of people who never had to live with them, In funerals I'd usually attend the service portion to pay my respects, but not go to the interment (family is exempt of course) afterward. Need advice on proper funeral wear. If it doesn't say anything specific then just dress modestly and behave like you would expect someone to behave at a funeral. I did not even have a funeral for my LO. I've had co-workers lose a family member and some of us got together and attended the visitation. I wouldn't say that the funeral is more for close friends/relatives, though. I advise carrying a few spare tissues with you, because people are going to be crying, and it can be a simple, appreciated gesture This is such a lovely story from NPR that I link to whenever people ask about attending a funeral: " Always Go to the Funeral. They’ll remember. My mom didn’t attend her mom’s funeral (so I didn’t go to my grandma’s funeral either) since her brother was there and they do not have a good relationship at all. Funerals are stressful but try not to worry too much. In my extended families, our guests, in-laws & distant relatives are "freed" after attending the wake; our close relatives are "freed" after the funeral (unless it's for a grandparent); thus We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. I have a childhood friend whose dad is going to You absolutely do not have to attend anyone's funeral unless you feel the need to say goodbye. It's not that I'm doing it to be a dick, or that I'm itching to First time attending a celebration of life event My friend battling stage 4 cancer lost the battle a few weeks ago and her celebration of life will be held in a small venue where they hold events Especially if attending the official funeral will cause you additional mental stress. For *** I initially, instinctively and stupidly thought 'have fun', then thought 'good Most funeral homes have tissue boxes scattered around. It is like you are supposed to die from depression along with the deceased person. So I would personally go if the funeral is for Carefully read the obituary. How do you feel about attending funerals? Archived post. I've been to three in a bowling alley, the VFW, and an Elks Lodge at The serious side of Reddit. 207 votes, 61 comments. If you're undecided about attending a funeral, learning the commonly You can go to either or both. I'm attending a friends funeral tomorrow, I'm early 20's and this is my first funeral in a long time (In other words, I have big boy clothes now but didn't before). Hey guys, I am planning to attend the funeral wake of a close friend of mine whose son passed away recently. Your presence communicates a lot to the family and other bereaved people. Normally in American culture, we wear black unless the person who Funeral attendance etiquette offers guidance for who should attend a funeral. When people die there is often pressure put on people This is what happens here in N Ireland - went to the funeral of a work colleague’s mother, as an English woman I was surprised at just how many people were there. It will be my first time attending a funeral in the UK tomorrow. Funerals People get loads of condolences at the funeral, but then people who are only attending move on a week or so later, but the family will still be grieving and will definitely appreciate it I had a lot of people die in my family and I was forced to go to the funerals, now I’m older I decline the funerals and my mental health feels better for it. I have been to funerals at churches, funeral homes, cemeteries, school gyms, outside the court house, and even at a football field. Hello, the father of a good friend died, and the family is holding a visitation and then the next day, the funeral service. Like sending a card or Yes, funerals are for the living - but much of it is about the years afterwards when you want and need closure. It's why wedding announcements don't have the ceremony details just a date, where as obituaries tend to list I'm going a funeral with my fiance at the end of this month. My mom says I should just go to the visitation, but I feel like I should go to the funeral to get some closure and to be respectful to him. When someone we know dies, it is natural to want to attend the funeral to pay our respects, but sometimes attending a funeral isn’t possible or isn’t desirable. If you really feel you are disrespecting the deceased by attending their funerals, are you sending cards or flowers to the bereaved? Are you bringing them a meal in difficult times? I’ll be attending a funeral this week and I haven’t been to one in years (since I was a child). If the funeral is just for family only, it will say so. I remember everyone who showed up to support me for my beloved grandma’s funeral (and the ones who didn’t). 45M subscribers in the AskReddit community. Thanks in advance! Attending is thus a gift you could give other people who will be glad to have your emotional presence. Watching a body you used to talk to and laugh with be put in the ground is a sharp I realized I spent a lot of my childhood going to a lot of funerals. I drove 5 hours to go to the funeral of one of my best friend’s moms, and I’d never met the lady at all. Offer a theory, share an opinion, or pose a question about (almost) any serious or heavier topics you can think of. Since he's your uncle it would be appropriate to show your support for his/your family. The important thing is to help your people in times of grief. Long story short, my cousin recently died, and her funeral is tomorrow. So, you should decide if it is worth it to you to do that. Most I don’t believe that it’s inherently selfish not to attend a funeral, but not attending can damage some relationships. I have only seen her maybe a few times in my entire life, and I don't know her much more than a stranger. Dioceses now allow Mass at the funeral home, and if the cemetery is next I also wanted to add that people say "funerals are to pay respects to the deceased or the family. What is the proper response to someone telling you they’re going to a funeral? Archived post.
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